¤ Fireworks ¤

In the grand scheme of things, I suppose this is how I always envisioned my return to the world of blogging. Not a whisper. Not a hint. Not even an over-the-top, "look I'm back" campaign to inform "you" people. Instead, my return is met as quiet as it was when I first started and I, for one, could not be any more pleased to be back doing what I love most. That being, expressing myself through words and space.

Truth be told, it seems like it's been forever since I last poured my heart into something meaningful. Distractions such as school, work, women, Facebook, Twitter, and YouTube have gotten the best of me but, still, my heart has always been attached to The Faded Ink.

Maybe it has to do with the fact that I helped mold it into something I felt had the potential to be as big/informative as all these other blogs and, at first, I swear the dedication I had to this whole thing was unmatched. I literally poured everything I had into making this the best blog I possibly could but, somewhere along the way, I got sidetracked and began to doubt my abilities as a writer.

For that I blame Troy University. Instead of making me a better writer, it made me question why I even picked up a pen in the first place and that's one of the scariest things to do when it comes to mastering your craft. Besides, they say raw, natural talent is something you can't harvest and, trust me, I learned a long time ago how good of a writer I am and I'll be damned if anybody says different.

But, is that any reason to justify quitting? Yes and no, I suppose. Again, truth be told, I never wanted to walk away from The Faded Ink. I just felt that in order to comply to the standards that were being put on me by Troy University, I had to relinquish the firm grip I had on being opinionated and, in doing so, I also lost a part of me. Not so much a part of me that didn't still have a passion to write but, more so, a part of me that felt compelled to. Everything at that point and time became "work" to me and I've never been that kind of writer. I'm more of a "whatever interests me" type of journalist and Troy University just wasn't having any of that.

So I quit...

Temporarily, of course. I'm debating as to whether I want to go back or not (considering I'm this close to graduating), but a part of me is hesitant because I'm afraid I'll lose and have to find my love for writing all over again. I guess the only thing I can liken it to is the movie "(500) Days of Summer" and for those that have seen it, then I think you can kind of follow as to where I'm going with this. If not, then I understand your confusion, too.

The point is, seasons change. As do emotions and, right now, I'm at a point where I really want to stretch beyond my imagination and grow as a writer. Whether I succeed is ultimately up to me. So as I close, rest assured that The Faded Ink will live on through me. I started this with a purpose and it will continue to live on with meaning. Failure is not an option. Never has been. Never will be.

"This time I'm really going off...fireworks."--Drake

-T.I.-