"Life is like a pen, you can cross something out but you can never erase it"
I've never claimed to be a good writer. Far be it from myself to give credit where credit is due; but having recently attained a degree in Journalism, I would say that that's all the justification I'll ever need in life when it comes to the things I can do with a pen.
But that's neither here nor now...
Instead, a more pressing issue has been at the forefront of my psyche for the last couple of days and a lot of it has to do with that never-ending question of, "what's next?" I graduated from Troy University back in July and although I'm strongly considering going back to school for my Master's, a part of me is also wanting to finally piece together this puzzle of mine called life. Every single day I'm being pulled in different directions it feels like and while I'm content with simply living in the moment, I'm constantly reminded that time is ticking with each passing second of the clock.
As much as that scares me, I try to remain as grounded as I can and it helps that a lot of that self-inflicted pressure is reduced whenever I'm around the people I've built close relationships with. My girlfriend, as well as a very small, select group of friends, has helped to build a strong support system around my well being and that helps tremendously because I know that no matter what I decide that they'll support me 100%. That is, at least a few will anyway...
I don't want to delve too deep into that particular topic just yet, simply because that is a blog worthy of itself; but I think it's fair to admit that in the midst of my indecisiveness that I've also been finding myself to be more distant toward a lot of people. Not consciously of course, but more so in the manner of happenstance.
Whether or not that's a product of me growing up remains to be seen, but I can't help but feel that in order for me to take the next step in the process that a few things are going to have to be addressed along the way. The first being what exactly I want out of life and, secondly, how I plan to go about bringing all of these things to fruition. All of these dreams and/or ideas are useless inside of my head if I never share them with the world, which brings me to the reason why I decided to return to The Faded Ink.
I planted this seed five years ago and watched it become an outlet for the theater in my mind. As much as I bottle up my emotions, the feeling I get from putting my words down on paper has always been freeing to me and I never wanted to lose that.
But I did. TWICE!
Be that as it may, I've never been more comfortable in my own skin and never has the ink been more alive in my pen. So here's to scribbling out the past. Not in the metaphorical sense of erasing, but in the re-writing of what was intended to be there all along.
-xO
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